A Real Christian Loves all the Other Christians, Part 1
1 John 4v19-21
28th July 2023
We've been thinking about the agape love that lives in every Christian, but we need to be clear: this love does not come from ourselves, it's the gift of God.
1 John 4v19
We love because he first loved us.
We Christians - we children of God - we who have been born again - love with agape love, God's love. We don't love perfectly, or anything like perfectly, but we do have in our hearts some of this agape love, which is a gift from God. Only Christians have this gift. Many other people, who have not yet found the redeeming love of Christ, love each other better than some Christians love each other, but they don't love with agape love, because God hasn't put agape love in their hearts.
We love God with agape love. We can only do so because God has made us able to do so: We love because he first loved us. He purposed before the beginning of time to save us through the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross, to give us His Holy Spirit, adopt us as His children and include us in his church. God loved us when we had nothing to give him. God loved us when we wouldn't have given Him anything even if we could. Even before we showed Him any respect, when some of us denied He existed, when some of us would use His name as a swear word, He loved us. When we were dead in our sins, He loved us. And, in humble gratitude, with awe and wonder at His great mercy to us, we love Him.
We also love each other with agape love, seeking to love God's children as God Himself loves them. Again, We love because he first loved us. We fail, of course, but we try. And we're getting better. Agape love is the love that sees other people as infinitely valuable, that wants to sacrifice for the benefit of others, that lays down one's life – literally or metaphorically - for our brothers and sisters.
1 John 4v20a
If anyone says "I love God" yet hates his brother, he is a liar.
John says this, in slightly different ways, several times in this letter, in Chapter 2 verses 9-11, Chapter 3 verses 11, 14-18 and 23, Chapter 4 verses 7-8, 11-12, and 16, and here – 8 times in five chapters, so we know it's important. This passage is the last time he says it. Love for our brothers and sisters in Christ is fundamental to Christianity. John wants to put it as plainly as possible. If you claim to love God, and at the same time you hate one of your brothers or sisters, you are a liar. John says:
1 John 4v20b
For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom
he has not seen.
You might want to argue with this. You might want to say that God, the perfect being, the creator of the universe, who gave you life, who died to redeem you, who has forgiven your sins, deserves your love, but the Christian who has sinned against you and perhaps others, doesn't deserve your love. But as I've been trying to say throughout this series of studies, the agape love of God isn't just love for those who deserve love, it's love for everybody. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
And we reach out into the world, trying to love our neighbours so much that they will find something of God's love in us, and so eventually find God for themselves. Agape love isn't some sort of social contract, where we'll be nice to those people who are nice to us, and see things the same way we see them, but we'll shout at, or ignore, or criticise, or gossip about, those who aren't nice to us, or who have a different vision. As Jesus said:
Luke 6v32-36
"If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love
those who love them.
And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even
'sinners' do that.
And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to
you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners', expecting to be repaid in full.
But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get
anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most
High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.
Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."
How much more should we love our brothers and sisters, even when they're not getting it quite right?
The Greek Bible has a word for what we call "brotherly love". That word is "philadelphia". In this letter John never uses it; he always uses the Greek word "agape". We're not just called to love other Christians like a brother; we're called to love them the way Jesus loves them. Jesus' love for our brothers and sisters is eternal, unchanging, unconditional. We're called to love like that.
Church is not fair, and it's not meant to be fair. Church is not some sort of deal where we all put in the same effort, and give the same offerings. Church is a community in which the stronger brothers and sisters should bear with the weaker brothers and sisters. We should love as equals those who don't give a as much, pray as much, come as often, work as hard, as we do. That's agape love.
You can complain to God, if you like, that it just isn't fair. But is it fair that the perfect Son of God died on the cross to pay for your sins? Agape love doesn't care about fairness. Agape love is sacrificial and forgiving.
When we first started having monthly social events at my church, we demanded that everybody who came paid at the door, and they all paid the same. We soon changed this so that people could contribute as much or as little as they want. We made this change because we want to base our life together on grace, not on fairness. You can't have both grace and fairness. Grace is unmerited favour. It's unfair. You have to choose between grace and fairness, and we choose grace.
Some people haven't come to church for months, but if any one of them comes along next Sunday, we'll welcome them with open arms, won't we? We won't criticise their non-attendance, or their reduced giving, or anything else. We'll just love them, won't we? Because agape love forgives and includes and celebrates. Agape love keeps no record of wrongs. Agape love wants to give more than we receive.
No matter what your brother or sister has done, no matter how they're living, agape love wants to keep on loving them.
Sometimes we can't show that love so much. If a brother or sister in living in gross, unrepentant sin, the Bible instructs us to have nothing to do with him (1 Corinthians 5:11). But that breaks our hearts. We don't want to deny fellowship to anybody; we want to keep on loving. Sometimes, love has to be tough. We don't like showing tough love, but sometimes it's the right, and actually the most loving, thing to do. But we welcome, we share life, and worship and prayer and fellowship with, and rejoice with, and sometimes weep with, as many of God's people as we possibly can. That's agape love.
Anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. We know that every member of God's church is a child of God, loved by God as much as you are, paid for with the same blood that saved you. We will spend eternity together. How can we not show our brother or sister patience, kindness, gentleness, understanding, and generosity? If our brother or sister in Christ lives near you, or worships with you, you have so many opportunities to show him love, to speak a kind, encouraging word, to express understanding and sympathy with his struggles, to help him with his practical needs. If you can't love him, how can you possibly claim to love God, who is his Father as well as yours?
1 John 4v21
And he has given us this command: whoever loves God must also love his brother.
Jesus once asked his disciples, "Why do you call me 'Lord, Lord' and not do what I say?" (Luke 6:46) and Jesus has commanded us:
John 13v13-15
"You call me 'Teacher' and 'Lord,' and rightly so, for that is what I am.
Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash
one another's feet.
I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.
And later on the same evening, He said:
John 13v34-35
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must
love one another.
By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."
How can we claim to love God if we ignore these commands?
I will deliver Part 2 of this study when I write about Chapter 5.